Thursday, October 07, 2010

Play it Safe...!!

You know what's the latest at the Games Village?

The days of the dirty rooms, water logging, and dogs' footprints (and other prints too) are over. The king cobras and their babies have also thankfully decided to leave the athletes in peace. After all they too are Indians and believe in the philosophy of "Atithi Devao Bhava" or "Our guest is like God to us" 

So, no more harassment to the guests. This time - the problem has been created by the guests themselves. As each day passed, complaints started ringing in, of clogged toilets. And when the maintenance men came and investigated the root cause, guess what they found. The toilets were clogged with -hold your breath - CONDOMS !!

All eyes then turned to the very 'large' condom machine installed at the village (We do know how to take care of our guests - don't we?). And a quick stock taking revealed that of the 4000 condoms stocked in there, about half of them have been taken ! Wow ! Today is only the fourth day ! A quick calculation - 2000 condoms in 4 days -actually three days gone ! Right now - the fourth day's games are on - (I mean - the sports activities - I mean - games like athletics, swimming, weight lifting - those games).

What does Mr. Flennel say? What can he actually say - except - that he's happy all the condom users are practising safe sex...

Apparently, condoms in Games villages around the World - invariably ran out. It happened at Beijing in 2008, about 1,00,000 condoms were over and gone, before the Games were two weeks old. And before this, in Sydney in 2000, the initial stock of 70,000 ran out within days.

The Organising Committee had better do some advance planning. Remember - A condom means never having to say you're sorry !

And if things do go wrong, guess who's always be blamed ? Yes - the committee..!

Sex is certainly not a Commonwealth sport. So how come..??

The key drivers of such fast "consumer off take" apparently are - more than 7000 athletes in the Village, a lot of time at their disposal, and many of them knocked out - (pun unintended - I mean they are out of the sporting events which they came to participate in) in the early days of the Games.

Well - the athletes are enjoying themselves. We are the good hosts, as ever. And the condom Company's sales team will have a good month to report.

Everyone's happy. And I am not complaining either. All I can say is - "Play on - safe"

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